As Valentine’s Day nears and Cupid prepares to fire off several wanted (and sometimes unwanted) arrows, I’m reminded of years and boyfriends past. Dust-covered greeting cards, stuffed animals, jewelry boxes, and ticket stubs symbolize the best of love before things fell apart to become the worst of love. Lately, I’ve been thinking about lessons learned in hopes of never having to learn them again. I’ve considered the relationships I left and those that spiraled downhill long before I could brace myself for the impact. Many of my exes taught me valuable lessons in trust, partnership, communication, and commitment. Others simply helped refine my debate skills. Each and every one taught me what it means to define and demonstrate that ever-elusive emotion called love.
Former lovers offer valuable insight to who we are, who we’ve been, and who we never want to be again. They are consistent reminders to pasts we’ll never outrun and decisions often laden with regrets. In life, we spend so much time trying to shield our hearts from the benefit of remembering the people that broke it. But maybe-just maybe-there’s reason to his name not leaving our tongue or escaping our memory. The truth in his power to hold hostage my heart is recognized in his ability to capture my mind. I learned from them, I became better through my experiences with them, they taught me more about myself than any horoscope or meditation session. So rather than ignore the profound impact they’ve had on me, I instead raise a glass. Here’s a note to the guys I fight to remember but won’t soon forget.
Thank you for being who/how/what you needed to be at a given time in my life.
Now, let’s never do it again. Cheers to celebrating the value in an Ending and the promise of a New Beginning (with someone else)!
Happy Valentine’s Day!